I love Creating, Crafting & Arts. Today & over the next few days we will be without power due to PG&E Power Shutdown for High Winds & High Fire Levels Danger. So I am taking this wonderful down time to Do what makes my heart smile & sing putting that much more love into my creativity. So here is what today’s inspirations came about…. Have a Blessed &Creative Week ❤
I thought maybe you would like to see some of the things I make and this is a recent recipe i adapted from a recipe book i saw a sample from but it needed something else for me. I have had insomnia since I was 12 yrs old and have been on Ambien since early 20’s so I played around with this recipe for a while and this is now my Officially going to bed Tea. X’s & O’s & Zz’s has officially lessons my need for Ambien when my mind cannot shut off, now that not to say Ill stop taking Ambien as a 4 day no sleep bender is a Not so Healthy situation. (Now I am not saying that this tea will work for you the same way or making claims to a medical issue this is my own personal experience, Always consult with a Doctor about any sleep issues.) (Herbals are a very personal thing so what work for me may not work for you.) There is one drawback for some about this Tea it is not cheap to make High Quality Organic Products and Certainly herbs that are expensive in small amounts a sample 9oz of Wood Betony is around $40 that’s about 1oz= $4.10. Please consider this as you are out Holiday Shopping at the Homemade/Handmade Crafting Fair’s & you see my X’s & O’s & Zz’s Tea in a 4oz small batch hand mixed, hand filled glass Jars, pre washed in Dr. B’s- Pure- Castle soap- organic cloth reusable tea bag, hand labeled, hand written, Filled with Love and Good Energy and it says $20 or even $40 depending on finding the right herbs, it only takes a small amount in the bags as the tea needs room to rehydrate and give you its Healing life ❤ until next time have a Blessing of a Month as The Hunters Full Moon arrives.
My mode of Transportation the next few days. My back went into full on spasms and then slipped out, Then went fully numb and lost all control of my body as i lost speach, thought & use of my body I was able to slide to the floor via dishwasher. I was able to make 3 calls Cecil, Raymond & work (I’m OCD that way -this is now routine since 1993) before i lost control and swelling and 3 Cysts are fully inflamed and pushing on my spinal cords. My next Epidural is not until 25th of September. Back issues are nothing to mess with when your back hurts don’t put off the pain OTC & RX will onlt hide the pain for so long. Proper care is needed Make your health a priority! Every month at the least but every 2 weeks or if at all possible 1 time a week schedule Massage Therapist & Chiropractor. I have slight scoliosis, degenerative discs, Arthritis, Spinal Stenosis & 3 cysts inside my spine inside the stenosis area which is my full Lumbar area. This also triggers a Fibromyalgia Flair up as my system goes into Fight or Flight which it is already in 24/7/365. I have gone into overdrive system. I have had back issues since age 12 when I fell out of a truck and landed on my lower back. Im posting this a a Massage Therapist, Healer & Hidden Health Issues person. My list is a bit of a read. I am able to help others who are in pain because I know the pain inside & outside, mentally & physically. It took me years to get here and now I pass on my knowledge to fight the depression that follows the loss of dreams and imagine you saw yourself becoming before your body turned on you. It takes time to find your way but never give up allow those around you to support you & find support in Healing. Your dreams are not gone they are just put on hold or changed direction for a reason. The universe will point you to the paths you just have to decide on which to travel. I chose to use my personal knowledge to help others and i cannot say enough about how happy I am with who I have become & still growing. I have a Huge Dream to help others & I hold it close. Dream BIG but allow change to happen as time passes you grow & so do dreams.
There are times when secrets need to be kept for the better of the person or the group or the society then there is the information withholding. When & What that information needs to really be assessed whether it is imperative that person knows this information or that it really takes away from nothing that would help them in anyway. If the fact is there is something that needs to be said or to be told that is imperative to that person good or bad, but they really do need to know it in order to either have the information to make a situation correct to be able to assess the situation and to know whether or not the information that others are giving is false or true this information therefore makes the secret the withholding of information detrimental to the person or the persons there for do you not in any circumstance withhold this or keep it secret. Now if the secret or withholding information is going to keep that person from harm of any kind the assessment of withholding and keeping it secret are there for valid for the well-being of that person be a mental, physical or spiritual.
Examples are is this person very domineering and tries to take over situations that can interrupt something that is very personal to you? Another situation a volunteer that is a regular issue that likes to volunteer and basically what they do is they use that time just to sit around and not do anything. Another situation a client that has been abusive, verbally, physically or sexually, these are situations that the person must know about there is no excuse not to tell anyone any of the situations that would be detrimental to them mentally physically and spiritually.
The situation of seeing or hearing someone that they may be cheating on a partner, a situation of drug, alcohol use or any other addictions that may be detrimental to one’s health or relationship, then you have the situations of other issues that may hurt a relationship in some way or another you do not just say what it is you saw or heard, you confirm the information, therefore withholding and keeping secret this information at the time is about a situation that is correctly withheld, kept secret. Now if what you have seen or heard is then confirmed to be truth, then the withholding or the secret I have is no longer helpful to that person for therefore you are the person that is withheld or keeping secrets something that is very relevant to their life, therefore you need to give this information to them or someone that it is best heard from just make sure all of your information is confirmed truth. Also understand this might bite you in the ass for telling the truth of a situation like this and in the end you may be in the bad guy for bringing about the end of a situation, a relationship, Etc..
Then there is the shit you should just keep to yourself that is your own personal issues not theirs like the way they style their hair the way they chew their food the way they keep their house many many other issues that can just hurt their feelings and really have nothing to do with them except for your own personal issues or someone else’s let every person be an individual and do their own thing just as you have the right to yours don’t hurt someone else’s feelings or make issues between others because of your own personal’s assess every situation and figure out if it’s your own personal issue with the situation or a real issue that affects that person on a physical mental or spiritual level.
Now then there is the does it really matter situation like for instants my grammar and my spelling I’m horrible at both, but doesn’t matter to me sometimes it doesn’t sometimes it does, that’s just a simple example of whether or not to hold a secret or withholding of information that pertains to say this blog that I write is it pertinent? Or I write too much about nothing or I write too much about something these are the kind of situations that sometimes it’s just better to keep it to yourself unless it truly is something that needs to be fixed.
Now don’t get all hissy fit it on me, these are just my opinions and my outlook on situations that go on around me that I find irritating and uncalled for. The fact that I just want people to just tell me the damn truth and not keep things from me because, all that does when I find out is pissing me off! Making me, assess my situation and those around me good or bad I will do what’s best for me and not anyone else because I am the person I need to worry about in any situation the only other people I worry about are my children and my husband anyone other than that will come after the fact don’t ever doubt, I know who I am and what my worth is!
I have been asked many times about my spirituality and how I can be spiritual without believing in God?
I was raised old Fashion pentecostal and my mother was the Sunday school teacher for the kids And yes I was that sneaky child who would steal the teacher’s book and make sure I had all the answers. I witnessed many things go on behind the church and what was presented in front of a congregation, I witnessed these things and questioned them I’d even been in trouble for questioning and asking why do you pretend that you’re hurt? Then why do you pretend then your not hurt? Put on a show in front of people when I know the answer. These are the things I asked even as a young child as I’ve gotten older and I’ve gone and done spiritual studies studying different religions and how so many religions are basically stating the same thing in their books. Every single spirituality is the interpretation of the person who writes the words and then the interpretation of the person who reads those words and then the interpretation of those listening to those words I happen to question every single one of those words. I question why this particular belief came out of these words, how the interpretation was received, I question everything, it is why I continuously study religions and the interpretations that other people have and why so many interpretations of a single religion. It does not matter which religion it is there are multiple interpretations of the same writings the original writings which to date really are not from the original person or persons who said them. Since the beginning of writing pictures, hieroglyphs, then words, for any of that each story is just an add on even from the first story as each person has their own interpretation of the events. And each of those stories is told multiple times by multiple people and every story is added to or embellished as they say so actually what really happened is someone else’s interpretation of those events. I believe in The Living Energies Surrounding Us and that We Are. If you did it it’s on you good or bad, You make the choices, You determine your path in life, You are the one who makes it or breaks it, Your Choices Make You, You! DO NOT Preach to me about who I should be or who you think I should believe in because I am not you! I will discuss, with others on the subject of religion but it’s an ADULT Conversation not winning self-centered, egotistical, better than others attitudes. Your beliefs are not my truth they are yours. So please when someone tells you please STOP and you just keep on, your my way is the only way preaching and selling your religion, your just another predator to me, and therefore you will be treated accordingly. We each have a right to our own views of this world and it’s time that forced conversation of religion, be Stoped! There is your answer in my short form, I hope it answers the question.
I have a question for you now….
Because this is my belief does it change me or the way you perceive me to be? The way I see it I’m just being me.
Always do what you Love and your life will always have everything you need just believe it so. But Remember sometimes the energies denial is for a purpose so do not waste the gifts you are receiving make them count.
We I had a small abundance of mixed veggies yesterday so excited seeing my families hard work paying off. This is a testing year to see what happens and what needs improving. The garden will be takin apart after the last plant is harvested. As we are still looking for a farm property to start ZenEden it’s hard putting so much work into it but we just don’t know when it will happen but for now testing different methods of sustainability in gardening many different ways. Holistic Farming practices permaculture, hydro & of course go old ground gardening.
Some Hints to My Dreams; We are still searching for the ranch properties to creat ZenEden, A palace created as a second chance & mentoring partnership, A Retreat. A Holistic, Alternative, Healing place, A Spa, Group getaways Personal or Business to decompress, a place to get back to the earth and allow Mother Nature to heal you. A public open Healing place. run by a very eccentric woman & her men & daughter Inlaw. We will employ VA as Ranch hands & Mentors to Troubled youths in the system on the Farmland. Daily activities to help each person find themselves. A Pay it Forward Concept Membership.
We have found the perfect place @ $12 million, it is ready to go. The property is in Sonoma & Mendocino County. Getting a loan, Grant or enough investors which I prefer, I prefer knowledge to help me create this ultimate Retreat, so If your a risk taker reach out to me.Continue reading “My harvest is starting”
Well I am still trying to figure out how to use WordPress and find myself lost & some how deleted on of my posts. Oh well it happens. I have been so busy and I have started a few blogs Ideas but have not quite gotten them done. By the time I get home from the spa it’s about 9pm We rush to put dinner together sit down watch a tv show to let the food settle and it’s 11pmish, writhing a blog post not suggest-able as I have found I’m so brain dead that it becomes a rambling mix of rant, an Idea, and nonsense. Brain overload. It has been a crazy month & it’s not over yet
So on to my beautiful garden which I Love to talk about….. It is coming a long good I have lost a few plants due to their sensitivity to the sun & high temperatures, Shade covering next year. I am learning as I go. I am still watering myself because we have not been able to find parts for the water holding tanks and the trays are still not level. I have never bought so much soil for gardening and it has been a huge cost $77.90 1/2 yard of Big Roots but I need the good stuff to start the planting now I have just potting soil to fill in and bulk up soil levels.
Still trying to find someone to help me write my business plan. I need to also find someone who understands the mix use of a for profit business with a nonprofit attached or governing entity. I am pushing myself to set a room current so I can start building my clients and establish myself. I have a lot of non physical healing modalities to offer, along with the physical. So For now my gardening helps keep me balanced. Enjoy their beauty so much
Oh and Today was our 20th Anniversary 6/27
I am so excited, this last Friday 24, & Saturday 25, I took my second set of classes to be a Teacher, now I am a Family to Family Facilitator! I will strive to take all of their classes Local, State & National levels. So I will be teaching out of Santa Rosa when I am scheduled but I am hoping to find a place in Cloverdale /Healdsburg/ Geyserville or Hopland to hold classes. Only 6per class if I am the only teacher. 2 Facilitators are recommended so that there is a shared responsibility of over seeing the students/members. All Classes are FREE. Becoming a member helps NAMI do its work for those in need of mental illness understanding, Educate, Advocate, Listen & Lead.
How and Why I went looking for help on Mental Illness. A friend and I decided we needed help copping with the effects of having a child with Schizophrenia. I found NAMI. but my story goes way back to my DNA. My Mother was mentally ill with a mix of diagnoses. Bipolar Disorder 2, Personalities Disorder, & Drug & Alcohol addiction. My Mother’s Story also was DNA started. My oldest sons story started with DNA. I Love my children so very much and there is a difference between ones Mother being mentally ill & ones child being mentally ill. With my Mom I was raised caring for someone mentally ill but she was an adult and she seemed to like her trauma, along with all of the health issues she had I grew up being the parent. My son my first born a huge piece of my heart ripped out as I sat behind a plexiglass window listening to my child tell me he is god and the pyramids are talking to him, the vacant yet crazy eyes and body language, I needed help to cope, to learn how to help my son, and so began my search for mental illness therapy help. What I found in NAMI Sonoma County was EDUCATION and the therapy of getting to know others in the same life raft as as you! If ANYONE reading this ever needs someone to talk to I am here. Just understand I work long late hours so it might be a day or so for me to get back to you or go to the link for NAMI Website and call the Warmline.
May your journey bring knowledge to you so that you become a teacher for the next person or child that is in need of it.
The saying…. When it is time for your lesson to start the Teacher will appear. Or When it’s time for you to teach the students will appear.
A few links below for NAMI Website & 2 different articles on Mental Health vs Mental Illness.
NAMI is such a wonderful support organization for those copping with loved ones with mental illnesses. I am in NAMI Sonoma County. What does NAMI stand for? National Alliance on Mental Illness = NAMI. NAMI Website https://namisonomacounty.org/
Mental health vs Mental Illness https://magellanhealthinsights.com/2018/05/23/mental-health-vs-mental-illness/
Mental Health vs Mental Illness https://www.heretohelp.bc.ca/q-and-a/whats-the-difference-between-mental-health-and-mental-illness
Mother’s Day a celebration of those who take the full roll of caregiver. A person who raises you, a person who makes the pain better & the person who a large piece of your heart will always belong to.
A person who fills this roll doesn’t have to give you birth, this person doesn’t have to be a female, you can have more than one mom & this person can be a mom to animals too.
Mother’s Day can be a hard day for those who have lost the person that filled this roll. Keep them in your thoughts as you celebrate with yours. My Mother is gone.
I love being a Mother to my 3 sons Jason, Raymond & Tyler. Two I gave birth to one we took guardianship of at age 7 my oldest nephew & I have had many Fur babies and will be to many more. I do not want gifts yet they have given them to me and I love & cherish each one I have received. I want only time with my children every day I am blessed to have them, but on this day I love the time together that we have.
This year my Mother’s Day is a bit of heartache as 2 of my boys are not able to be with me. My oldest is in jail because he had his first Schizophrenic break while in another state. My youngest is in Navel school so I cannot see them or be with them.
My middle child spent the day with me helping me in my garden which is what I asked for & no gift. Then my husband & son made dinner & my daughter-in-law came over.
We worked hard in the garden and there is still much to do but it’s coming along. I feel such an accomplishment when working in my garden a feeling of Zen of Fulfillment. When my family helps it bring such a joy into my soul, my being is grounded & my heart fills with such Love there is no room for anything else in it.
I send Blessings to every Mother.
I am trying to work on my business timeline schedule and I am finding it very hard currently as I have a lot of things at home that need to be done personal & personal biz. & my Job. A crazy glimpse into my Chaotic life & headspace.
This long list of The 3 W’s & Time are my little Rant on them and just to let others know they are not alone in their Chaos. Learn to Ask for help (hard to do I know), Learn your limits, keep making those To Do Lists, Learn to Stop and give yourself time to just sit and breathe for 5 minutes 10-15 minutes is better, & Remember you’re never really alone, it may feel that way at times but we are out there. I got this it just takes me a few tries sometimes but I will get things done.
I wake about 7a-8a just depends, I get things done like dishes, load or 2 of laundry, fold & put away my laundry, if I have time try to catch 1 tv show on DVR before getting house work done with 2-3 cups of coffee to bring me down from my edgy attitude I wake with because I don’t sleep through a night I toss & turn from the tingling numbness that happens after an hr or so from pressure on my L1-L5 squeezed spinal cords. I’m not a delightful morning person. I drink a whole pot of coffee +, before leaving for work/ job (Coffee calms me down I don’t get the wake me up, buzz, or energy).
I’m so busy most days especially this time of the year the 3 “W’s” of my life kick in and my manic side takes over and it’s go, go, & GO! I have my job I leave my house around 10:45a to be at Work 12p-8p but if there are no clients then no work & I am on call waiting all day for maybe 1 client so I really cannot get to busy because I have 1 hour. I get changed to work clothes drive 45min & get room ready. A client at 12p-12:50p and one at 6p-7:20p, I am stuck there and homework is what I mostly accomplish it’s good But… my Work at home is not getting done. I live about 45min from work and wasted gas if I drive home, only to have to return hours later more wasted time and money.
Work J.O.B.; fulfilling someone else’s dream and goals their rules, their money, never knowing if a full work day, only a few clients, clients with hours in between wasting gas & money vs Working My Personal Biz my Dream my money!
When there are wasted hours in my day I feel depressed and agitated. This combination is not good for me being an energy worker, Massage Therapist & Holistic Therapy at my Work/Job I am an independent contractor so no clients no payments so wasted time, loss of money, loss of my working & getting things done work.
Working; Then I have my current business of crafting & Massage and Therapy with personal clients. Working on my business plan for ZenEden Getting all of the involvement of what I need. Planning on where I am going the sooner the better! Get to the investors to get it rolling and start healing & helping others. Starting the Non-Profit & For Profit. That will govern ZenEden Ranch & Healing Retreat.
I know if I start a Work project I’ll get into it and lose track of time because that project becomes my focus. So my Personal Business is suffering and not getting accomplished just left until I maybe have enough time during an evening.
Working-Busy; The vegetable garden needs to be built and planted, Care of plants I have everything from replanting to separating young plants from parent to its own, to cleaning the gardening areas & watering this can take 3-4 hours to do currently, we are hoping to put in a drip & spray system in after the new vegetable garden is set up and finished on its self watering system. There is the everyday things around the house that need to be done on top of this ( I need a house keeper because I hate cleaning but also someone to help me get & keep organized I’m a messy person, chaos surrounds me.
I need to be outside with my plants, working in the soil, watering, replanting, propagating, cleaning the outside to look nice, to bring a peacefulness to my Spirit, bring about my abilities to exchange energy with my beloved plants. This time of year you will mostly find me outside creating my gardens.
During the Winter month my depression & S.A.D. set in. Winter is getting crafting done work on the indoors projects, time to clean crafting areas up maybe? I watch a lot of Hallmark Channel & Read a lot. The struggle of what was me going, going & going has almost disappeared from myself. Do I really do not leave the house, because being around other people’s energy hurts me. To many people and their full on mixed flow of energy make my body ill.
T.I.M.E. there just doesn’t seem to be enough in the day & evening. F.U. T.I.M.E. the 4 Letter category. I am always trying to make a schedule for myself, (I have them all over the house). Finding time & making time are difficult for me. I’m easily distracted to another project and forgetting the one I Just was doing. I am getting better though over the years.
Well there it is a long rant about 4 Letter Words – Work & Time. I hope this didn’t bore to many.
Blessings be bountiful to you.